My soft spot

Most Thursdays I go to Kaeli and Paige's school to help their teachers a little. The girls just love it. Most of the time I'm very proud of how they handle it. They both understand that I'm there to help the teacher and the whole class so neither of them tries to monopolize my time. And, since I ALWAYS get asked this question---my mother-in-law watches the boys for me on that day. She's a tremendous help and I appreciate it more than words can express.

Now on to the point of why I'm writing. There is a little boy in Paige's class that has found a special place in my heart. Last Thursday I spent a lot of time helping him with one of his worksheets. Then during his group lesson with the teacher he just started crying for no apparent reason. It was breaking my heart so I took him in the hall and tried to talk to him while we colored together. He wasn't really in a talkative mood so we mostly just colored together in silence. The guidance counselor came and got him and I left for the day. Today I was in the classroom again. He didn't really say anything to me, but I didn't expect him to. The teacher took the class over to read a book and he stayed in his seat. He stayed there with his head down the whole time I cleaned the tables off. When I finished cleaning the tables I sat down in a chair. The minute I sat down this little boy came over, sat in the chair beside me, and without a word, laid his head on my shoulder. Just like I would do with one of my own children I instinctively picked him up and put him in my lap. He sat there in my lap during the entire story, with his head on my chest and my arms wrapped tight around him. I think he just needed a hug and I was very happy to oblige. But, I just can't get him out of my head. I asked the teacher about his home life and she couldn't say anything more than "it's not very good". I understand she can't go around announcing stuff about all the kids so I certainly did not push the issue. But, I just wish I knew what he's going through. I wish I knew what to do to help him. For the moment, I've just decided that every week when I go in I will be sure to give him just a little extra time and attention. I know it's not much, but I hope it makes even a tiny bit of difference for him.

I just felt the need to write about my day because I can't seem to get that little boy out of my mind. It also reminds me that even on the days that I feel like the world's worst mother, I know my kids are lucky. They know they have a family that loves them and they know they are safe at home with us. In the end, I think those are the most important things we can give to our children. It's just hard for me to accept that there are so many children out there that don't even have that.